An NFL Erotic Story
WHAT WE THINK TO DO WHEN OUR DORM LOSES POWER AND WE CANT WATCH TV By: Gags and LaRocque The night is a complete Donald Hayes. I was very Mike Singletary, and ready for a night out in David Boston. I was dressed very Sterling Sharpe, and ready to Samari Rolle.   My hair was very Brian Griese.  I saw a hot girl named Ashley Lelee and decided to roll the Kevin Dyson. I asked if I could buy her a Marty Schottenheimer of Jose Cortez from the Matt Bahr. She had a large Greg Biekert and was very Billy Joe Tolliver, but I was certainly in no mood to be Carl Pickens, and I also overlooked her O.J. McDuffie.  We talked for a while, and Phillipe Sparks flew.  I wanted to Marshall Faulk her so bad!!! Although it was still very Quinn Early, we decided to hop into my David Carr, and head back to my Charles Stackhouse.  We drove down the Tai Streets, and then took the Dominic Rhodes to my house.  On the way home, she began to suck my Doug Flutie, and I became not such a good Donald Driver I almost lost control of the Mark Wheeler.  I wanted to put my Ron Dixon her.  Finally, we turned on to Max Lane, and into my driveway.  My Morgan Sheppard was Brian Barkering at us. We went in and began to drink some Jim Millers, and I really began to come out of my Art Shell.  I asked her if she was interested in smoking some Roosevelt Potts, and she said that she was very Keenan on that idea.  When we finished, we went into the kitchen, and ate some hot Julius Peppers, some Kent Graham crackers, some pork-fried Jerry Rice, and some cookies that were Duce Staley. All of a sudden, she noticed the Marc Bulger in my pants.  I tried to Kurt Warner that I was no Brandon Short, in fact I was rather Steve Largent, but she told me that she liked them Howie Long.  I knew then that I wanted to put it in her Todd Pinkston.  She was like Clay Matthews in my hands.  I began to A.J. Feely her Eric Moulds.  It was Peerless Priceless.  She had great Y.A. Tittles.  I told her to Lorenzo Neal, she did so, and her head began to Bob Christian on my Keyshwan Johnson. When she was Warrick Dunn, I layed her down on the Tim Couch and took off her pants, and realized that she was very Joey Harrington, but it was too late to find a Tiki Barber open anywhere, so I started Chad Eaton.  It was then that I gave her the Jeremy Shockey!  She jumped on me and began to ride me like a Peter Boulware.  The whole time she was grabbing my Lance Shulters.  She started screaming and telling me that I was the Peyton Manning as I ripped her Sam Gash. Then I Jerome Bettised her over the counter and put my Kato Serwanga in her Marion Butts, It was my night to be a Bart Starr.  We Stan Humphried all night long.  I was a real Champ Bailey When we finished, I again put my dick in her butkus, but it came out Dave Brown.  She finished me off with a Norman Hand job, I Randall Cumminghammed and she ended up all Jamel White.  Finally, I made her Mike Golic my ass.   she was yelling ?Rob Moore!? but my Bryan Cox had become very Mushin Muhhamed. When we were finished, she told me that she wanted to snort some Dexter Coakley.  Then she made me nervous when she said she had to drop a Deuce McCalister.  It was then that the Ty Law showed up.  I looked out the windows and saw the Leonard Marshall at the door.  I escaped out the back Charles Way.  I hitchhiked with a Stacy Mack truck driver and made a getaway to Joe Montana, and called my Lawyer Milloy.  ?All this over a couple of Teddy Bruschies? I thought.  ?How was I to know that she was too Steve Young.  That stupid Leroy Hoard!? Well, they threw the Marty Booker at me, and told me that I only had one Kerry Collins.  I called my mom and she said I was being a real Mark Chmura  I had to share a jail Parcell with Ray Carruth.  He told me about how he had Webster Slaughtered his wife with his Brian Blades, and how she was picked up by the Maurice Hurst.  He even Terell Buckleyed her in. I have developed Randy Moss on my feet from the prison showers.  There is a Rod Gardner here who always looks at me funny.  I really wish I was an Antonio Freeman.  What I wouldnt give to be free like an Issac Byrd.  I am never even able to watch my favorite TV show, the Tom Brady Bunch.  People always change the Chandler on me.  I can also never listen to my favorite band Jason Hanson.  All the prison guards like to listen to Michael Jackson. So because of this one night, I live with a bunch of Ben Gay guys, my willy is green, and I now have a Junior Seau on the way.  Why didnt I wear a USC Trojan? When I got out for one Vonnie Holliday weekend, we took Junior to a Jeff Garcia concert a Terry Fair in San Fransisco.  I Warren Mooned the crowd, and gave some lucky ladies a look at my Haywood Jeffries. Have a good Sammy Knight.
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